Eng-er-land revisited

I was far too hasty, drifting into despondency following England's failure to qualify for the Euros. Just think of all the pleasure it has brought to so many. First of all there is the - at first sight - hapless manager, who nonetheless walks away from the job with all the money he would have earned if he'd stayed the two years until the end of his contract, and who is free now either to take it easy or take another job! Bet he hadn't thought of that when he took the job on!
Then there's the footballers themselves. It's been many decades since a top pro has had to worry about making sure of the win bonus, to keep their families in the luxury they're accustomed to. Now they'll be able to enjoy their earnings in the summer, and take their wives and kiddies on a really lovely, long holiday to somewhere exclusive where there's no riff-raff cluttering up the beaches.
Talking of riff-raff, we shouldn't forget the humble fans, either. Just think of all the money they'll save by not having to fork out on travel, tickets, accommodation and sundries in the Kingdom of Austro-Switzerland. They too will be able to treat their wives and kids, instead of pissing their wages up the wall like they usually do. Every cloud does indeed have a resplendent silver lining!

Eng-er-land

How shit is the England football team now?
It's enough to drive a chap to religion.

Material World

Punning may be the lowest form of wit, but nobody does it better than Quentin Cooper on "Material World" (BBC Radio 4, Thursdays). Not only can you enjoy his ingenious puns, you learn stuff too!
I found myself inwardly applauding one he came up with while interviewing a scientist about the way in which bees perceive their surroundings. Unsurprisingly, bees apparently see the world in a completely different way to us, so: "What a bee sees is not as simple as A-B-C."
Respect!